Our Lusty Cheating Neighbor

~~~~~ PG Excerpt ~~~~~

?Hi, Monica.? I pressed a button on the phone. ?You?re on speaker with Steph. Do you mind??

?Of course not, darlings. I have to say, I?ve been expecting this call.?

?Have you?? I said with heavy sarcasm. ?Then maybe you can explain why half the damn neighborhood is treating our front yard like a damn litter box.?

?Don?t take that tone with me, young man.? Her voice had changed from cool to chilly. ?I?m not the one who?s been needlessly antagonizing my neighbors. What did you do to poor Sandy? She was bawling her eyes out when she came over here last week. It took me forever to calm her down.?

I glared at the phone. ?I didn?t know it was a crime to refuse to cheat on my wife.?

?Well, not a crime, darling. But still, one might consider it terribly rude, from Sandra?s point of view, after the way she has thrown herself at you. I must say, she is far more taken with you than she has been with any other man in several years. But that is not surprising, as lovely as you are.?

I stared at Steph, who was looking right back at me, shaking her head. ?All right. Am I the only one who is taking crazy pills here? Why is it rude to be faithful to Stephanie??

A light chuckle. ?Well, when you?re the neighborhood hotwife, you get used to men chasing you, not the other way around.?

I blinked. ?The neighborhood what??

A long silence ensued, followed by an even longer sigh. ?Young people. You didn?t read the brochure, did you, John? Did you, Stephanie??

?What the heck has that to do with anything??

?Sandra,? Monica said, as slowly and clearly as if she was speaking to a dim-witted child, ?is the neighborhood hotwife. As such, she is?contracted?by the Paradise Place HOA to sexually service any man, or woman, for that matter, who might want to use her for that purpose.?